Posted by sean on March 18, 2019 at 11:56 pm in Leeds United with No Comments


Despite their success, I have said all season that Leeds won’t go up.

On Saturday, they lost to their nearest promotion rivals, Sheffield United (that’s right, folks – I’m still not over it). This comes just weeks after getting thrashed 4-1, by Norwich – the other of the three teams bidding to win promotion.

Today I learn that the club’s best defender, Pontus Jansson, is crocked and will therefore miss a number of crucial games. I wouldn’t go as far to say that Pontus will be receiving Disability Living Allowance, for the next few weeks, but things don’t sound great.

I am not superstitious. I think anyone who believes horoscopes, must have seriously low intelligence. I also don’t believe that magicians are able to contact and speak to the dead.

I do avoid walking under ladders – firstly, because these days, chances are I would be on my mobility scooter – meaning not only would I not be walking, but my wheels would most likely get jammed in between the ladder. Secondly, people who use ladders often store tins of paint, buckets of water or tool boxes, on the very top, meaning that by passing underneath, I run the risk of getting covered in paint, soaked with water, or killed, by a falling hammer.

I think it’s a good idea not to be superstitious in life. I have enough issues to cope with, so don’t want to add to my troubles by avoiding stepping on cracks in the pavement!

There is one area in life, where I am superstitious, and that’s when it comes to football.

One of the reasons I have stuck by my prediction that Leeds will cock it up, is because I generally believe that they will – I’ve had lots of heartache and let down, over the years supporting The Whites.

I am like an abused housewife, who keeps vowing to leave her violent bastard of a husband, but never does, as he keeps convincing her he’s changed. He can’t change and eventually the housewife discovers she’s in the early 1990s, her name is Mandy Jordache and she is in an episode of the Channel 4 soap, Brookside. Now, I’m not suggesting that I am about to murder a football club and bury it under the patio, but I’ll be tempted if Leeds screw this one up!

The other reason for my pessimism, is that I secretly hoped that by stating I think everything will fall apart for Leeds, they will prove me wrong and romp to The Premier League, by winning automatic promotion.

Now my prediction – which was as uncommon as much as it was controversial, amongst fellow Leeds supporters – appears to be coming true. My Psychic Sean* alter-ego is now worried that by trying to jinx them into success, I have accidentally cursed my own team.

Good name, don’t you think? As the word “Psychic” sounds like it should be spelt with the letter “S”, when coupled with my name, it’s almost alliteration.

Therefore, I want to say this…

THE BLADES (Sheffield United) ARE GOING UP!

 

WELL DONE TO THE CANARIES – Norwich City – WINNING THE LEAGUE & GETTING THE PUSSY!

That oughta do it…

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