Sean's Stories

Posted by sean on 26/06/2016 at 3:23 pm in Holiday with No Comments

We have been enjoying a Cornish holiday, to celebrate our one year wedding anniversary; staying in a lovely wooden lodge, surrounded by picturesque countryside. The holiday promised lots of rest and relaxation – something we have received by the bucket load.

On our arrival, the lodge was spotlessly clean. We were treated to a pamper pack, with flowers, bathrobes, champagne and chocolates (well, it is our anniversary). One of the best things about the lodge was it came with its own private hot tub, which we enjoyed very much! I wish that I could fit the hot tub in the back of the car and take it home.

Something else that I’d like to take home, but Claire forbid it, was the hens and ducks, who live onsite in a cute little hen house. I will openly admit to holding a conversation with some chickens, who I am adamant talked back in their own way (probably asking for food). I’ll certainly think differently next time I eat a McNugget.

One of our trips away from the lodge was to the theme park, Flambards. I haven’t been there since I was a child. It has changed a lot since the 1990s. A few attractions from back then still remain, including the Blitz and Victorian exhibitions (although the latter seems a lot larger than I remembered). There are many new rides at the park, although one of my childhood favourites was still there – the spinning hot air balloons. As the weather was wet and we had just eaten lunch, we decided against going on any of the rides ourselves, especially after we overheard a child moaning how he was going to puke after getting off a fast moving rollercoaster. Flambards have their own amusement arcade, which always draw us in, like bees to honey. Claire is a fan of the claw machines, while I love the 2p pusher. I was a little disappointed with the quality of prizes on the 2p machine – no ceramic ducks or dogs, like we won at Butlins – just crap sweets, which were probably out of date and tainted with a taste of copper. I didn’t win anything anyway. Claire was equally saddened by the fact the claw failed to pick up any soft toy Minions for her.

The only downside about our holiday has been the weather. As I type this blog, on the final day of our break, the rain is battering our little lodge. It is nice and cosy, but not when you want to venture out and about. Another of our days out was into Bude town centre. Bude is a nice little town. We managed to buy some souvenirs and gifts from a shop, which smelt of a mix of dog and seaweed. A wonderful sweetshop was discovered, which we spent far too much money in, while sheltering from an almighty downpour of rain, which caused a river of water to run down the high street.

Last, and by no means least, we did what everyone who visits Cornwall should do – buy a pasty and cream tea. Pasties and cream teas from Cornwall are amazing – there is no competition. You must ensure you make your cream tea correctly, though. Jam onto the scone first, followed by the cream. To do it the other way (cream, before jam), is what they do in Devon, and sacrilege in Cornwall.

We have had an amazing holiday, despite the weather. It has been such a great way to celebrate our first wedding anniversary – we have already looked into coming back in future years. For those interested, we stayed in Ivyleaf Combe Lodges – I would recommend this place to anyone.

Posted by sean on 02/12/2015 at 1:45 pm in Holiday with No Comments

I’ve come back to work after an entire week off, so my recent lack of blogging cannot be excused by a lack of things to write about. In fact, for the first time in my life, I was probably too busy to blog! So what did I do in my time off, which meant that I was so preoccupied that I couldn’t possibly log onto WordPress? I shall tell you now, so sit back, put your feet up and make yourself a nice cup of tea, coffee or whatever warm beverage you desire.

It was my wife, Claire’s, birthday this weekend. So we decided to go away for a minibreak at the start of the week. During our earlier years as a couple, we would go away to Weymouth and thought it would be nice to revisit the seaside town as a married couple.

We had previously stayed in a bed and breakfast, and although this was nice, we decided this time to opt for something different. It is always awkward at a B&B, as it feels like you’re staying in someone’s home. This is no more so than at breakfast, when you and another couple are sat in the owner’s dining room, being forced to make small talk about things you have no real interest in. To avoid this, we stayed in a Premier Inn. I’ve stayed in these hotels before and as we all know, they come personally recommended by Lenny Henry. The beds are apparently so comfortable that you can sleep in them anywhere – I’ve seen old Len having a good night’s sleep in a field, at a party, even in the middle of a busy city street.

Weymouth is a really nice place to visit, but when it’s out of season and cold, the seafront is like a ghost town. Some of the amusement arcades were open, but they all had crap prizes. Claire tried to win a soft toy on the claw machine, but failed miserably. I think it was rigged and had a million pounds into the thing, we still wouldn’t have won. She did win a lolly on a 2p machine, after putting in about a kilo of copper coins.

The town centre was just like any other town in England; with your WH Smith, Debenhams and a Poundland. The only shop of any note was a retro sweet shop. Not only did we find some nice gifts to take home with us, but I discovered some treats I have been trying to find for ages – sugar mice and fireball jawbreakers. The sugar mice are a guaranteed way to get diabetes – pure sugar, bound together with glucose syrup. I should really have popped into Boots on the way back to the hotel to pick up some insulin. The jawbreakers were a favourite of mine as a child – they are gobstoppers, which burn your mouth. I know that I could have achieved the same effect by just putting burning phosphorus into my gob and burning off the roof of my mouth, but that’s less fun.

We did see the sea, which is always good, considering we went to a seaside town. I wasn’t prepared to strip off and wade into the Mediterranean in Portugal on a boiling summers day, so there was no chance of me getting into the freezing waters of Weymouth. Even the dogs, which were running up and down the sands, kept out of the sea.

The train home was eventful. I found five pounds on a seat when we first got on. The person who had obviously lost it was long gone, so I took it, but felt guilty about doing so. I really hope the money belonged to some rich businessman or a nasty chav, and not a little old lady. We sat next to the toilets. Luckily, they were only used once (not by us, I will add). A woman also got onto the train with her pet dog, which was petrified. The dog cried for its entire stay on the train. The dog also stunk. At least I think it was the dog and not its owner.

That’s part one of my mammoth week blog. I will write about a shopping trip, some rubbish football and cleaning the house shortly.

Posted by sean on 14/04/2006 at 12:31 pm in Holiday with No Comments

This morning I received some terrible news. The holiday is off. Dan In The Mix has dropped out therefore totally buggering up the plans for myself and the rest of the group.

At first I was angry. I wished Dan would fall into a Scottish marina which contained a dead swan. Then the anger turned to rage and I spent hours pacing up and down the flat muttering under my breath and twitching like a mad man. My pacing wore away the carpet as well as my shoes and my feet started to blister and bleed.

I then thought it would be best to check myself into the local mental asylum. Upon arrival I told the nurse the problem and that I needed to be committed. She agreed and asked if I wanted to go calmly or kicking and screaming. Naturally I chose the latter.

I am now home, back in the flat. They gave me some pills to take. They have calmed me down. I am now sitting down on cushions, eating candy floss and listening to Enya. It has been a very busy morning.

Posted by sean on 12/04/2006 at 9:39 pm in Holiday with No Comments

This week I have been looking into booking a summer holiday for myself and a group of friends. I already have a fortnight booked off work and was hoping to fit a weeks holiday into that break. We’re thinking of either Cornwall or Devon, it may not exotic but I hear Torquay has a palm tree and if “experts” are to be believed due to global warming we can expect temperatures of a Mediterranean climate.

Now it is just a case of finding out who wants to go, which places are available and which foolish property owner wants to let out his beloved, southern cottage to a party of four twenty-something lads.

Weather permitting it’ll be a nice break, I have been to both Devon and Cornwall many a time when I was a child and they are two beautiful counties. The alternative to this holiday is a week on a canal boat in Cheshire. I went on a similar boating holiday last year and it was more than enjoyable, I would just like a change this year though. Besides which I don’t fancy trundling along through the heart of Manchester down a canal which the locals use as a rubbish dump. Believe me, if the Mancs treat their waterways anything like the Brummies that’ll be exactly what it’s like.

We plan to go on 24th June until 1st July and as none of us can drive will be dependant upon the good old railway network to take us down south. This leaves one possible problem. The holiday I have planned falls right, slap bang in the middle of The World Cup.

One of the 2nd round games (which England could easily be involved in) is on Saturday 24th June with a quarter final (again which could feature England) on Saturday 1st July both at 4pm. Now either we’re going to have to get an early train or in the event of unavailability or train delay rely upon good old Alan Green on BBC Five Live. You never know, England may be knocked out of the competition before it comes to that.

Finally the plan is, like last year to bring my laptop with me so I can blog. I won’t have the luxuries of Orange 3G but have setup GPRS access though my Nokia 6230 via Bluetooth. I’ll register with Orange for the costly, unlimited usage package, update my blog and then rape them of bandwidth to get my moneys worth. Fight the power.

Phew! That was a long blog, you still with me? I’m off to watch an episode of Family Guy and then get some sleep.

Sean's Stories

On this website, you’ll find me blogging (almost) daily about everyday life, living in Bath, working with computers, and the occasional bit of football stuff thrown in.

If you're expecting The Man Booker Prize, you've come to the wrong place. If you want to read a collection of sometimes eccentric, often disturbing and rarely amusing ramblings, gorge your eyes on this.

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