Hull Shitty 1-2 Leeds United
YESSSSSSSSSS!!!!

Leeds FINALLY won a game! Well done to all the lads for beating local rivals and fellow relegation fighters, Hull City. The whole result came as a shock, not least because Matt Heath, one of the worst Leeds players of all time (and there have been loads of donkeys), scored the opening goal!

Like the true fan I am, I followed the game closely on Sky Sports News. It was an extremely nerve wrecking evening, and I was almost touching cloth due to anxiety.

Hopefully this will be the turning point in The Mighty White’s season. We’ll beat Norwich at the weekend and then destroy QPR and Crystal Palace at Elland Road. Leeds are staying up, Leeds are staying up… I hope!

There’s a problem with one of the computer systems at work. Every time a user tries to run the application, they are greeted by the error message

CRAPPROG.EXE HAS ENCOUNTERED A PROBLEM AND NEEDS TO CLOSE. WE ARE SORRY FOR THE INCONVENIENCE.

I am sure every Windows XP user has seen this error message at one point or another. It makes me wonder, are Microsoft genuinely sorry for the inconvenience, or are they just bullshitting us?

With the recent release of Windows Vista, I would like to see a more honest approach from Bill Gates and his ‘Microsoft Minions’.

CRAPPROG.EXE HAS ENCOUNTERED A PROBLEM AND NEEDS TO CLOSE. BUT WE DON’T GIVE A FUCK.

Along with getting married and starting a new job, moving is supposed to be one of the most stressful things you’ll ever do. Fortunately, my current flat change has gone relatively smoothly, until now…

Annoyingly, the one factor which is proving the most tedious is what should normally be the simplest – getting Sky installed.

I managed to convince both the letting agency and local council to allow me to erect a satellite dish, that was easy, but when it comes to ordering the damn system, it all goes wrong.

My telephone call to the Sky order line was answered by someone sounding just like Tobi Anstis (the guy who used to present Children’s BBC and went on I’m A Celebrity). He was helpful enough, yet still insisted in reciting all available packages to me (even though I clearly stated that I wanted the Sky Sports Pack).

The problem arose when arranging a delivery address to post my contract and viewing card to. I currently live in a flat on Newbridge HILL but and moving to a flat on Newbridge ROAD in late February. Tobi Anstis point blankly refused to post any material to my current Newbridge HILL address, even though I told him that I would have no access to my Newbridge ROAD flat until the end of next month.

Tobi Anstis had obviously had an argument with Otis the Aardvark and was having none of it. Don’t worry though, it just so happens that Johnny McWatkins works for the devil (AKA Sky) and is kicking some ass and pulling some strings for me.

#'end

Just a quick announcement:

I looked round the flat on Newbridge Road (mentioned below) this afternoon and accepted it. I will move in 1st March/late February.

It is fucking excellent and the photos do not do it justice.

More to follow….

This clip here has to be one of the funniest things ever to appear on YouTube.

Watch the way Noel back-pedals when he realises his mistake!

My flat hunt is still going strong. I am looking round another place tomorrow afternoon. It sounds a lot larger than the flat I looked at the previous week, boasting a double bedroom, large living area, kitchen and bathroom.

Here are a few pictures of it

Actually, that’s Steven Gerrard’s house – a place which I am not at all jealous of.

Here’s the place I want

Nope. That’s not it either. This is tiny flat in Chelsea which made national news after it was sold for £170,000 – no wonder Frank Lampard gets paid so much!

This is the flat I am looking at tomorrow!

Nothing really happened this weekend. Friday night, I met Simon and Mr. Watkins for our weekly Bomberman meeting – the traditional scenes of violence, insanity and melee being ever present.

Saturday I went to watch football. I didn’t make the trip to Elland Road to see Leeds, nor did I travel to Gloucester for Bath City’s away game. I walked down the road to Twerton Park to watch Team Bath. I’m not a fan, but they were playing Kings Lyn, a team challenging Bath City for promotion and I thought I would lend my support to the students of TB (they certanly need it!) in the hope they actually beat KL – which they did. Bath City also won 4-0, which is very, very good. The Leeds result was not as impressive, so I won’t mention it.

Today was just a lazy one. The morning was spent drinking coffee and relaxing after all my exertions yesterday. In the afternoon, Simon came round (note: with a whole bottle of wine to himself) to watch Arsenal play Manchester United. I was very pleased to see the scum get beat 2-1, especially as Arsenal’s winner came so late on in the game. ManU have won so many matches in the dying seconds, it’s nice to see them lose late on for a change.

It’s back to the workplace tomorrow and then flat hunting in the evening. I noticed that the local post office had removed my ‘Wanted’ advert – talk about hindering my plans. I will have to go round and kick some ass tomorrow, or maybe just ask them politely to put my ad back up.

Finally, can anyone make out what this guy is talking about? He phoned into 606 (a football phone in on BBC Five Live) yesterday. The caller certainly doesn’t give the stereotypical, drunken Scotsman image any reason for change.

It’s been really windy in Bath today, and Watkins hasn’t even been to visit. My short walk to work was most treacherous. I daren’t take an umbrella for fear of being propelled into the skies by gale force winds. During my trek to the office, I wished I had phoned in sick and avoided the hazardous conditions.

Me on the way to work

On hindsight it appears I was wise to go to work. When I arrived back at Newbridge Hill (where I live), I was greeted to a scene of mass destruction. The neighbouring B&B had lost its sign – it was completely snapped off in the wind. Apparently the residents are away on holiday, so God knows where the sign had gone – half way to Bristol probably.

The greatest destruction however, was discovered at my flat. Half the chimney had fallen down in the storm, crashing right by the front door. Had someone been standing there, or leaving the flat, they would have surely been killed. As I blog, half the chimney is currently hanging from the roof of the house – it could fall down at any time. Tomorrow morning, on the way to work, I will have to run from my house to the street to avoid “death by chimney”.

The whole incident was a tad scary and makes you think how storm related deaths (like these tragedies) occur.

If anybody wants to make a donation to my landlord (for a new chimney) or the B&B (for a new sign) please fill in your credit/debit card details on the DEC website. Forget the tsunami, that took place years ago, Bath is the place in crisis in 2007.

Frank Lampard signs for Aston Villa!

I found this in my inbox this morning. It made me laugh.

Oh, and well done to Bristol City for beating Coventry in the FA Cup. I am now left with a dilemma. Should I take up an invitation to watch City play Middlesbrough in the 4th Round at Ashton Gate or watch my local side, Bath City play Hemel Hempstead in the league at Twerton Park on the same afternoon? Fingers crossed Sky or the BBC will show the Bristol City game on a Sunday, meaning I can go to both!