My blog celebrates its third birthday this weekend. One of the first blog entries I made was my thoughts on Leeds United’s relegation from The Premier League to The Championship. Three years on I am blogging again about another relegation for Leeds, this time to the far reaches of League One.

I know that there are many people to blame for this. People who have not given the effort Leeds United deserves. People who have financially raped the football club and its fans. People who don’t deserve to be associated with a football club as great as Leeds.

These people are as follows.

Ken Bates – senile old man from Chelsea, living in tax exile. Think that says it all.

Kevin Blackwell – his tactics in Cardiff last May cost Leeds a place in the Premiership. His signings left Leeds with an overweight, elderly squad, fit for relegation.

John Carver – just because he’s a Geordie who worked with the great Sir Bobby Robson, it doesn’t make him any good. During his short time in charge, he humiliated Leeds at the highest of levels. I will never forget losing 5-1 at Luton.

Kevin Nicholls – spineless captain who wanted out when he was needed most.

David Healy – a prime example of a player putting country before club.

Jonathan Douglas – given the captains armband. Is sent off late into the season, simply for losing his temper.

The whole first team squad – On paper, a squad capable of pushing for promotion. The sack of shit let everyone down. Useless twats. I am also a Bath City fan and watched The Stripes battle week in, week out. When I’ve watched Leeds, they have lacked any fight. That is why Bath are champions and Leeds are down!

I hope that next season all of the above have fucked off and will disassociate themselves from Leeds United Football Club.

Two Leeds United employees I do have time for are the manager Dennis Wise and his assistant Guy Poyet. Both have worked under extremely difficult circumstances. I hope they stay at Elland Road and help in next seasons rebuild.

Unsurprisingly, my broadband is still not live. I spent a long time on the phone to TalkTalk’s customer “services” representatives yesterday and got nowhere. At one point I was told to call back “sometime… no… in 15 minutes… errr…. in 30 minutes… it’s up to you”. Professionalism at its best, I am sure you can agree.

This morning I tracked down Charles Dunstone’s personal e-mail address. Believe it or not, it’s not cunt@talktalk.net – Mr. Dunstone doesn’t use TalkTalk – further proof that he is more of a crook than an idiot.

After sending a strongly worded e-mail (with a slight threat of legal action) to dunstonec@cpw.co.uk, I received this reply.

Dear Mr. ######

Many thanks for your email, I am extremely sorry to hear of the problems you are experiencing with the connection of your broadband account and concerned that you have had to contact to me in search of resolution.

I have got someone investigating what has gone wrong and we will be back to you shortly.

In the meantime, please accept my sincere apologies

Regards
Charles Dunstone

I Googled a line from it and it has been sent out to other customers. A little annoying, but at least I’m getting somewhere…

1) He has stated, in writing, that he will investigate the problem – a valuable piece of documentation should I ever need to take legal action.

2) The Google search only threw up a few results. This was not an automated response, somebody did read it. Maybe it was Charles, maybe his secretary, maybe the cleaner – but somebody did read and acknowledged it.

3) He’s investigating what happened. Now, I know he isn’t the most trustworthy man in the world, but after reading web forums, it does sound like he gets stuff done.

I will keep you informed.

Sorry to anyone offended by that blog title. No apologies however to Charles Dunstone, the Managing Director of The Car Phone Warehouse and the infamous internet service provider, TalkTalk.

Last month I signed up for their telephone and internet service, ignoring poor media publicity received by the ISP. On hindsight I made a terrible mistake. My TalkTalk phone line is working (I’ve been one of the lucky ones), however my broadband is not.

My broadband “go live” date is now over a week late. It is not as if they have haven’t had long enough to sort it out (I have been a customer for almost 6 weeks). I have been given various connection dates by their staff – none of which have been met. What’s more, when I do finally get connected, I can look forward to broadband speeds which equal that of a 56k modem! My dad is unfortunate enough to have the service and downloading music, videos and anything else you would expect to do on broadband technology is impossible!

Luckily TalkTalk offer a 30 day trial to new customers as of January 2007 (I pity those who signed up last year). As soon as I go live on my broadband, I am getting out of their “service” immediately, returning to BT and finding an independent ISP.

A final warning about TalkTalk and their founder…

• BELIEVE WHAT YOU READ – THEY ARE SHIT
• CHARLES DUNSTONE IS EITHER A CROOK OR A CRAP BUSINESSMAN
• THE BROADBAND IS NOT FREE – COMPARE YOUR TALKTALK BILL TO A BT ONE
• IF YOU WANT REAL BROADBAND, STICK WITH BT AND FIND AN ISP
• IF YOU WANT OLD 56K MODEM BROADBAND AND A LONG, LONG WAIT, SIGN UP FO TALKTALK.

Mr. Dunstone, if by chance you are reading this blog and would like to discuss these issues with me, feel free to get in touch. If you can prove to me that you can provide a good service and fulfil your companies promises, I will indeed stay with TalkTalk and withdraw my comments.

Hahaha! Check out my MySpace page! You’ll see that I have destroyed it. Never more will I receive MySpace associated e-mails from skater dudes, coke heads and paedos!

Mr. White, you may have forced me at gunpoint to create the account, but now I have destroyed it – your reign of terror and internet dominance over me is over!

Mwa Ha Ha Ha Haaaa!

Just a couple of videos from yesterday

- The winning goal
Note: the screaming is not me!

- The celebrations

Enjoy!

I was probably the only City supporter yesterday who, while ecstatic about the result, was also very saddened at full time. At Five O’clock, when the champagne was flowing at Yate, I received the very worrying fulltime score from St. Mary’s Stadium. Leeds had lost 1-0 to Southampton. Worse still, all their relegation rivals had picked up points.

Unless an astonishing fight back takes place in United’s final two games, along with an almighty annihilation of one of their relegation rivals, Leeds will be playing League One football next season.

You may think that watching a local, non-league side win the league would ease the pain and make things better – it does not. I have a love for Bath City, but a very special love for Leeds United. My original “big team”, who brought me many memories and great players – Mark Viduka, Alan Smith, Lucas Radebe, Dom Matteo – the list goes on.

League One or not, I will still go to watch Leeds whenever I can next season, and just because I have found affection to my local team, Bath City, I still love The Whites just as much as I did all those years ago.

Bath City have done it – they’re champions after beaten Yate 2-1. What a day!

The first half was terrible. At half time we were trailing 1-0 and were all worrying about bubbles bursting. The second half was the turnaround. City equalised, and as news filtered around the ground that promotion rivals, Team Bath, were losing we all started to believe again. Promotion became a reality when City scored the winner.

It wasn’t long before the referee blew his whistle to mark the end of the match. This sparked a mass pitch invasion. Hundreds of City fans scaled the metal barriers, climbing onto the dry, dusty pitch, to congratulate their players.

The champagne, which has been on ice for so long, finally came out and the party started. Players, fans and City backroom staff, all partying at Yate’s tin hut of a ground.

The coach journey home was equally erratic, with the driver celebrating the victory by giving us a tour of Bath city centre, sounding the coach horn at every opportunity, leaving tourists and Bath residents looking rather scared.

“… and I spanked her like this”

Craig Davidge now has a statue in his honour

Going up!!!

“That’s why we’re champions!”

Pitch invasion!

“Champagne! Champagne for everyone!”

“He’s ugly as fuck, but he’s taken us up”

Champions!

Jim Rollo – pissed already!

“We’ll never play you again!”