I need a recap, having just watched the trailer for the new season. Stunned and very excited. This is going to be amazing.
Just as long as they don’t reference that diabolical second movie… I mean, Billy Connolly was in it! What were they thinking?
I realise that I haven’t blogged for a few days and have probably left you in suspense over Tescogate. I have forgotten where we left off. I told you I was sent out of date cheese. I was promised by Tesco, that a store manager would ring me to explain what has been going wrong. Despite not letting my mobile phone leave my sight all day, no telephone call was received. Great customer service! I contacted Tesco, who offered apologies in abundance (again). I was offered another telephone call, but at this point, I had reached the end of my patience and asked for a letter to be sent. Two days later, I found a letter on our doormat. It was from a Tesco ‘dotcom manager’. There was yet more apologies, although to their credit, a promise of what will be done in the future, to avoid repeat errors. Apparently, they have employed a ‘Customer Service and Loyalty Assistant’, who will personally check all our shopping. That is great if it works, and I am more than happy to give them the benefit of the doubt. Enclosed in the letter was a “gesture of goodwill”, in the form of a gift card. There was nothing to tell me how much had been placed onto the gift card, but when I tried to use it on the latest online shop, I was told the card was invalid. I will take the card with me next time I go to an actual Tesco shop, but at the moment, this gesture of goodwill is just an empty gift card. Wow. Thanks.
As anyone who is afraid of spiders will know, this is the time of year when they all come into our homes to mate with each other and kill us all. With this in mind, I am always on my guard while at home. One evening last week, we ate tomatoes for our evening meal. Not just tomatoes – that would be stupid – there was other stuff like cheese, bread… that’s not the point. Anyway, while tidying up after eating, I was taking the leftovers to the bin, when I looked down on my hand to see a large, black spider. I screamed like a big girl and threw all the rubbish on the floor. Claire came running out of the kitchen, before bursting into a fit of laughter, to an extent where she ended up with tears rolling down her face. My wife isn’t a cruel person, which makes the fact she was laughing at my distressing spider encounter strange. Claire was laughing at me, because it wasn’t a spider on my hand at all. It was, in fact, a tomato stork. In my defence, it was very dark green, large and had lots of spider-leg type bits sticking out of it. Plus most of the lights were turned off. It did look like a spider at the time! while Claire took time to compose herself; I picked up all the rubbish I had thrown onto the floor, in my fright; before putting it in the bin.
Tesco have messed up again. Let’s give them credit though, they went an entire three weeks without messing up. Today’s instance was a classic – delivering out of date food. We ordered two packets of mozzarella cheese, as have been planning a Mediterranean style meal this evening. When unpacking our shop, my wife discovered that not one, but two packets of the cheese were out of date by an entire four days. It’s a good thing we checked, as I wouldn’t want to risk eating a rich, soft cheese that far past it ‘use by’ date.
We did the usual routine – Claire rang Tesco, while I tweeted. They apologised profusely, which is pretty standard. As I’ve previously said, I refuse to blame the customer service team. I asked for compensation or a letter of apology. I was offered the letter. Perhaps had we eaten the cheese and developed a nasty strain of food poisoning, we may have been able to claim some form of financial payment, from one of those ‘no win, no fee’ lawyers. I will reluctantly accept the letter, under the condition it is from the manager of the store where our order comes from and not the poor people who keep apologising to me for someone else’s negligence.
Last Saturday, we got up stupidly early to go and look at sheep. “Only in Somerset”, I hear you all shout. Except these sheep weren’t of the furry, grass eating variety. The sheep we were visiting were made of stone. If you put mint sauce on these and bit into them, you would shatter your teeth.
I found myself waiting in a cold, wet and almost empty car park at Cribbs Causeway shopping centre, waiting for the ‘Great Sheep Roundup’ exhibition to open its doors. In recent months, if you have been brave enough to venture into Bristol or visit London, you may have seen sculptures of the popular character, Shaun The Sheep, placed around the city. One hundred and twenty of these sheep were created (although I somehow counted more), all with clever, unique designs. As well as the entertaining residents and tourists to the cities, the sheep raised lots of money for charity, which is always a good thing. If you were really adventurous and outgoing, you could follow an official trail and track all the sheep on a mobile phone app. We are neither adventurous or outgoing, so decided to see all the sheep under one roof.
I took photos of every single sheep. This may seem a little excessive, but was nothing compared to some people visiting the event, who took photographs from almost every possible angle, as well as photos of each of their many children in front of every single bloody sheep.
Anyway, here’s a collection of my favourite sheep. If you really want to see all 120+, have a look here.
So, everyone’s favourite nice-guy footballer, El Hadji Diouf, has accused Steven Gerrard of being a racist and jealous of this career. Personally, I find the racism accusations absurd. However, I can totally see why Gerrard would be envious of Mr. Diouf. After all, Diouf played for Leeds United – Gerrard didn’t. What’s Gerrard actually achieved in his career? Yes, he has played for his country, won the Champions League and FA Cup. But besides that, what has he done? El Hadji Diouf has played second division football, while coached by Neil Warnock, for Leeds United Football Club. Gerrard must be green with envy. As green as the colour of all his money.
On this website, you’ll find me blogging (almost) daily about everyday life, living in Bath, working with computers, and the occasional bit of football stuff thrown in.
If you're expecting The Man Booker Prize, you've come to the wrong place. If you want to read a collection of sometimes eccentric, often disturbing and rarely amusing ramblings, gorge your eyes on this.