Sean's Stories

Posted by sean on January 10, 2019 at 10:23 am in Football with No Comments


Modern football is rubbish.

Rubbish for lots of reasons. Far too many to list here.

One of the things which makes modern football rubbish, is those now infamous half-and-half scarves.

Real football fans don’t buy such crap. Why would you wear an item of clothing, bearing the name and logo of a rival club – albeit on only half of the scarf?

The scarves generally seem to be worn by football tourists, who generally don’t give a shoot about the team they claim to support.

Just imagine if these scarves existed during the 1940s. One half would depict the Union Jack and the crudely stitched face of Sir Winston Churchill. The other half, predictably, would be made from black, red and yellow wool (or a much cheaper alternative), with the mug of Adolf Hitler. Classy.

You know the one thing worse than a half and half scarf? A half and half house…

While I stand firmly by my prediction that Leeds United will bottle their season – despite currently sitting top of the league – there is the tiny chance that they may get promoted.

If this totally unlikely event was to take place, a situation would develop where my team, Leeds, would face Claire’s side, Liverpool.

Does this mean we would decorate our home in our teams’ colours, for the residents of Weston to admire and ridicule?

NO FECKING WAY!

Posted by sean on January 8, 2019 at 8:35 am in Football with No Comments


Footballers are a daft bunch. If they’re not mixing prescription medication with alcohol, they’re associating with racist idiots.

  

Despite the two stories in the links above, proving strong contenders for ‘Stupid Footballer of the Week’, another “professional” managed to romp home with the award.

Step forward Wayne Hennessey…

The above photo was taken at a meal, attended by Wayne and his Crystal Palace teammates, following their victory over Grimsby in the FA Cup.

What does it look like the young Mr Hennessey is doing in the photo? Some might say he is performing an inappropriate salute, similar to that of Adolf Hitler. Others, such as Wayne himself, claim the photograph shows him trying to raise his voice…

Did Twitter believe him? What do you think?

Out of the 2,000+ replies, here are some of my favourites…

(Sir Norman Fry)

(Father Ted)

(Fawlty Towers)

Posted by sean on January 6, 2019 at 12:31 am in Football with No Comments


Cardiff City boss, Neil Warnock, is not happy. Just for a change…

You could say that Neil found the whole thing a disgrace…

I’m starting to think that Neil should have asked his wife, Sharon, for one of these for Christmas…

With Santa not due down our chimneys again for almost 12 months, I thought I would help Warnock out, by giving him a few alternatives to his favourite word…

  • dishonor
  • ignominy
  • shame
  • humiliation
  • reproach
  • discredit
  • odium
  • degradation

And just in case he has forgotten the meaning of the word…

disgrace
/dɪsˈɡreɪs/

noun
noun: disgrace

  1. a person or thing regarded as shameful and unacceptable.
    “it was a disgrace when Neil Warnock swapped Luciano Becchio for Steve Morison, while he was manager of Leeds United”

Posted by sean on December 28, 2018 at 9:54 am in Bath City, Football, Leeds United with No Comments


You’ll recall that I recently blogged about the possibility of the top 5 divisions in English football, all having champions starting with the letter ‘L’.

Well, I have the discovered an even greater and geekier stat. Brace yourselves…

The last time that Liverpool won the top flight, Leeds won the second division and Bath City got promoted to the Conference.

Currently Liverpool and Leeds sit top of their leagues, while Bath City are just outside the promotion play offs.

You know what this means? Bath City will finish midtable; Leeds will bottle it, losing in the play offs, and Manchester City will win the Premier League.

LEEDS UNITED. SECOND DIVISION CHAMPIONS 1989/90

Posted by sean on December 23, 2018 at 10:59 pm in Football, Leeds United with No Comments


Looking at football league tables, I’ve noticed that teams beginning with the letter ‘L’ are doing rather well, at the moment…

  • Liverpool – 1st – Premier League
  • Leeds – 1st – Championship
  • Luton – 2nd – League One
  • Lincoln – 1st – League Two
  • Leyton Orient – 1st – Conference

We’re only midway through the season, and I still think Leeds will bottle it (if any team can, it’s Leeds); but, for a football stats nerd, like me, it’s great.

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