Mr. John Watkins and Simon both came to mine last night. The evening was a relatively uneventful one. The lack of any violence, wine spillage and flatulence from John, were all welcome however.

Instead, we just watched Friday night television. I’m not normally a fan of the kind of entertainment shown on such evenings, but this week there were two shows starring David Mitchell, who is funny and always worth watching.

After TV, I set up the Nintendo 64 and we had a game of GoldenEye. Unlike last week, I was able to get the sound working, so I could actually hear the bullets from my Walther PPK entering Boris Grishenko’s chest, breaking his ribs and organs.

Boris is John’s character of choice and to be fair, he killed me a lot more than I killed him. The normally grey suite of my Siberian Special Forces guy was red and bloodied. If GoldenEye was real life though, I would have won. My buddies in the KGB would have just poisoned his fish supper.

I’m off to Plymouth shortly, daawn saafh (I believe that is how they talk on the south coast). As a member of the Leeds United Faithful, I am making the trip to watch the Giants of Yorkshire take on the Titans of Devon (making both teams seem normal size).

As you probably know, Leeds have been somewhat disappointing of late. Instead of winning games like they did last year, the players seem to have taken the attitude that losing 3-0, 4-0 or 5-1 is acceptable, much to my frustration.

Still, I am sure today will be different and when the Leeds players walk out on the pitch and notice the efforts I have made to make the trip, they will give 110% and beat Plymouth 6-0. Yeah right…