Posted by sean on July 23, 2020 at 11:42 am in Roman with No Comments


Posted by sean on July 22, 2020 at 11:33 pm in Leeds United with No Comments


Do NOT call Specsavers.

You are not seeing things that aren’t there.

There is no need to travel to Barnard Castle.

Leeds United really do have their hands on silverware!

 

CHAMPIONS!!!!

 

Posted by sean on July 22, 2020 at 11:00 am in Bath City with No Comments


While I was enjoying a weekend celebrating Leeds United’s promotion, my other club, Bath City, also had a very important event on the Sunday.

Due to finishing the football season in a very respectable fourth place, City were invited to enter a play off competition alongside five other teams.

The prize for winning the play offs is promotion to a higher division; competing with stronger opposition, from all over the country and not just clubs located south of Gloucester.

City won promotion to the same national league exactly 10 years ago, where they spent two seasons – the first allowed me to watch my local side play some incredible football. The less said about the second season, the better.

As well as finishing the regular season between second and seventh place, every club wishing to take part in the play offs must ensure all their players are regularly tested for COVID-19.

Considering how dangerous the virus is and how the nature of football means that it is impossible to social distance, making such tests mandatory is fully justifiable.

The biggest problem was that the cost of regular testing. A sum of £35,000 was required to pay for all necessary tests. Bath City would have to find this figure all by themselves.

While a Premier League player like Jack Grealish only has to tie the laces on his football boots to earn 35 grand, non-league clubs need to beg, borrow and steal to even get close to such riches.

Beg, borrow and steal is exactly what Bath City did. Although I feel I must point out that there was absolutely no use of financial loans or theft when raising the cash. Begging? Some could class it as that…

A ‘Crowd Funder’ page was setup, asking City supporters to donate, in a hope that the £35k target would be reached.

Clearly there was a lot of support for the club competing in the play offs, as money came rolling in from all over the world. The support was so strong that the original financial target was surpassed, with the campaign raising over £52k (at the time of writing).

I am sad to say that I did not contribute. This is not because I am a tight-fisted Cyril Sneer. The reason behind my lack of donation was because I was against the club from entering the play offs at all.

Like everyone on the planet, we are living in very uncertain times, thanks to the ongoing coronavirus pandemic. Football clubs, especially those at lower levels are under great financial pressure.

Personally, I think that it was wrong to spend such a large sum of money on a competition where success is far from a certain.

My other concern was that in the event of Bath City winning the play offs and therefore promotion, how could the following season be financially funded? A magic money tree?

Sadly, Magic Money Trees do not exist.
Sadly, the fat blonde buffoon does.

Nobody currently knows when the new season will kick off, and even when it does, will fans be allowed to attend? No supporters through the turnstiles means a lot less income.

Based upon City’s national adventure, between 2010 and 2012, travelling to games hundreds of miles away, is a lot more expensive than what the club is used to. Journeys to the likes of North Yorkshire can be exorbitant, especially when you factor in travel costs and overnight accommodation – a luxury currently not required when visiting Hungerford.

This is not to say I lack ambition. I want Bath City to compete at the highest level possible. However, the club’s long-term future should not be put at risk as a result.

City is a club very close to my heart. I have lost count of the number of other football clubs who have gambled on success. When the glory doesn’t happen, or the coffers dry up, these clubs face financial ruin and even extinction. If this happened to my local club, it would be devastating.

While I am traditionally a Leeds fan, I have attended hundreds more live Bath City games than at Elland Road.

I have travelled as far north as Darlington and Barrow; the furthest east as is physically possible without falling into the Channel, at Dover; and not forgetting Truro, the deep south of Cornwall.

Had I travelled any further East, I would have ended up in the sea!

Most importantly of all, I met Claire, the love of my life and now wife at the football club. Staff from the playing and management side even attended our wedding!

I hope anyone who was in doubt, now appreciates how much the club means to me, as well as a large number of other supporters.

This is why I was against any play off participation. It is not to say that I don’t respect those fans who wanted to enter the competition and dug deep to ensure it went ahead. Just because we disagree on some things, there is no reason to fall out. After all, we all want success for Bath City.

So, the play offs themselves…

There will be no further need for coronavirus testing, as City sadly fell at the first hurdle – beaten 2-1 by their opponents, Dorking Wanderers.

As with all football matches in the country right now, no fans were allowed into the ground to watch the game.

The only way of doing so, was to pay to stream the coverage over the internet. We did just that.

The performance of the stream was awful, resulting in frequent freezing and even the BT Test Card being displayed. Despite the poor coverage, the geek in me thought that simply being able to see the Test Card was worth the £5.99 we paid for the useless stream.

Incidentally, I sent an email of complaints and have since been given a refund.

It would be very unfair for me to comment on the Bath City players’ performance, simply because during the first half, the frequent freezing and lack of signal made the entire thing unwatchable.

BT Sport appeared to step up to the mark in the second half of the game, as did the City players. We managed to watch the final 45 minutes without interference, freezing and (unfortunately) test cards.

The players certainly looked a lot better after half time, managing to score a late goal, resulting in an exciting end to the match.

Alas, it was too little, too late.

I don’t know what could have been done differently. I respect anyone who contributed towards the Crowd Funder page.

I also appreciate how tough it must been for the players, considering they hadn’t kicked a ball in a competitive match for four months. This did show at times, but they also worked bloody hard.

Hopefully it won’t be too long until the 2020/21 season can start – WITH fans in the ground.

I think pre-2021 could be a tad too soon for me to go to a match, as I intend to keep my distance from any form of crowd until I know it’s safe…

See you in 2032, then?

Posted by sean on July 21, 2020 at 8:16 am in Leeds United with No Comments


Considering how long I have waited for Leeds United to pull their bloody finger out and get promoted, you would have thought that I would have been singing from the rooftops of our little cul-de-sac.

Surprisingly, I am not, and this isn’t just because there is no wheelchair ramp to the roof of my house.

I couldn’t find a photo of a wheelchair on a roof, so here’s one with a dog instead.

In years gone by, before Claire and I lived together, my friend Simon and I would stay up late in my flat, drinking cider and taking about football. I would fantasise about what I would do the day Leeds won promotion. Sad, isn’t it. Some men fantasise over super models. I would dream of Leeds United.

My best-made plans, from as far back as 2006, would include…

– buying a selection of blue, yellow and white fireworks. Setting them off in the back garden and playing the club’s anthem, Marching on Together, at full volume through a massive speaker.
– finding a pub in town with one of those digital jukeboxes that claims to have every song ever released in it’s library. Play Marching on Together repeatedly. Looking back at this idea, with a more mature, sober and cowardly head, I realise that the pub locals would either be oblivious to the music, or kick my head in.
– catch the train up to Leeds and party hard (probably by myself) outside Elland Road. I am sure my gran, who was alive at the time (God bless her), and lived in Leeds would have been more than happy for me to stay with her. That is unless I got myself arrested by the West Yorkshire Police.
– drink my own weight in Sheppy’s Dabinett cider. My tipple during my twenties. This option could either be executed on its own, or in conjunction with any of the above three ideas.

Hook it up to my veins!

Considering that the majority of those “fantasies” could have resulted in my death – either from third-degree burns, murdered in a pub, or alcohol/cider/apple poisoning – it was very good that Leeds United managed to stay shit long enough for me to reach a level of maturity, where they no longer appealed.

I lie. I haven’t grown up at all. It’s just that my physical health has deteriorated to a point where I would be unable to carry out my dangerous plans.

Even my idea to place champagne on ice didn’t work out. As I am not drinking at the moment, I bought Nosecco instead of the expensive alcy stuff. Then I realised that we didn’t have any ice. No problem – just place the bottle next to a bag of frozen McCain oven chips.

I’ve always wondered what these lorries are transporting.

The last straw was the realisation that we don’t own a champagne bucket. The only bucket we have in the house is a plastic one, used when cleaning the bathroom floor. I don’t think it has been used by Claire or me to puke into, but if we were ever unlucky enough to feel the need to spew, the bucket would be called upon.

Given the magnitude of Leeds’ achievement, I don’t think drinking alcohol-free wine, from a bottle stinking of grease, potato and toilet was really appropriate.

The craziest thing I have done since promotion was confirmed on Friday, was to join Claire in singing Pump It Up! The Whites are going up! This lasted all of 15 seconds, when we realised Roman was petrified. We ceased immediately. I didn’t realise my voice was that bad.

Don’t get me wrong, I am filled with unprecedented joy, but am well aware that I’ve been a bit of a wet drip with celebrating.

Just in case anyone was in any doubt over how happy I am…

Nothing else in my life-to-date has come close to giving me the happiness experienced on the day Claire and I married. Not even Leeds United could manage that!

There are a small number of other treasured moments, which I suppose could be called the “joint second” happiest days of my life.

I won’t list them all here – firstly, because one or two are a little personal.

Secondly, if I was to accidentally forget a special moment, anyone connected to that event could take huge offence and demand to know why my great uncle Felix’s 96th birthday party from 1984 has been omitted.

By the way, as far as I know, I have never had a relative named Felix. I am not that callous.

What I am trying to say – slowly and badly – is that while my wedding day remains the happiest day of my life – Leeds United winning promotion to the Premier League as CHAMPIONS, is a joint second! It is also without a shadow of a doubt, my greatest sporting moment.

I’ll probably blog a lot more about Leeds and their great success over the next few days, weeks, months. OK, maybe not months – chances are they will have returned to being rubbish by September.

Posted by sean on July 20, 2020 at 2:27 pm in Health with No Comments


You may have noticed that my isolation clock has disappeared from the top right of the screen. That is because I broke it. The clock has been smashed!

The reason behind this blatant act of vandalism, is that as of 12:19pm today, I left the house!

After 142 days, 19 hours, 19 minutes and 14 seconds, I escaped my self-imposed Alcatraz!

My journey may have only been a little spin in the wheelchair to the next street, but it felt fantastic to be outside!

To experience the warmth of the sun on my face and fresh air against my skin.

Bliss!

  • About Me

    So you stumbled across my blog. No doubt after searching for something bizarre on Google. Before you hit that 'Back Button', why not stay and have a read for a few minutes?

    If you are after a website which gives advice on how to hack an iPhone X, download the latest Steven Seagal movie, or view nudy ladies, you've come to the wrong place and may now press 'Back'.

    However, if you would like a lifestyle blog, written by a 30-something chap, living in Bath (England), feast your eyes on this.

    You won't discover how to copy PlayStation 4 games. What you will find is a blog, covering life in the West Country, the highs and lows of supporting two unsuccessful football teams, while sharing a house with a wife and rabbit.

    All written by a man, somewhere on the sanity-scale between normal and eccentric.
  • Archives