Sean's Stories

Posted by sean on February 21, 2019 at 11:45 pm in Shopping with No Comments


Following on from yesterday’s blog, where I discovered the horrifying cost of buying a Terminator robot toy (and having to build it yourself), I later saw another advert, for another product equally expensive – in fact, it’s slightly worse…

I’m talking about

An actual battleship! I hear Donald Trump has already ordered 10 subscriptions.

Let’s hope he’s not hoping to send his fleet to North Korea, Russia or Mexico anytime soon. There are 140 issues…

The fact it’ll take Donald Trump, 3 years to receive all the magazines and battleship parts, isn’t the worst part.

What will make me steer clear of this product – besides not having the patience to build the damn thing – is that it’ll cost £1,248.60 to buy it all the issues! That’s more expensive than that Terminator doll.

I suppose it can be seen as good value. For example, take a top of the range, modern warship – the Arleigh Burke-Class Destroyer.

This impressive-sounding son of a bitch, costs $1.6 billion – about £1.22 billion. The scale model of the ship in the magazine is 1:200.

200 multiplied by the cost of completing the magazine subscription – £1,248.60 – is £249,720 (note the comma, NOT the dot!). That means the so-called modern warship, the Navy are presumemly buying, costs £1,219,750,280 more than 200 model ships.

Now, if all that logic makes sense to you, you can only be one man… Hello, Mr. President.

 

Posted by sean on February 20, 2019 at 6:27 pm in Television with No Comments


Has anyone else seen the advert on TV for the Terminator model? No? Let me jog your memory…

Going to subscribe? You won’t be if you have more than one brain cell, or have never been in possession of a jackpot-winning Euro Millions ticket.

Why? Take a closer look at the advert…

£1.99 – “that’s great value”, I hear you all shout.

£8.99 – “not too bad for a few issues. How many are there? 120? How much will that cost me?”

£1,071.80 – “ouch”.

Considering the original Terminator movie was released in 1984 and inflation prices, the real-life robot used in the film, 35 years ago, probably cost less than this model.

Posted by sean on February 20, 2019 at 6:09 pm in Leeds United with No Comments


To celebrate – or lament – 100 years of Leeds United, the club have designed a centenary badge, for next season…

One could argue that the design is rather simple. I am yet to hear confirmation or denial, from the club, on whether or not the badge was designed using Microsoft Paint, by their now infamous intern…

Back to the badge – I don’t know if I like it or hate it. I could never go as far to say that I love it.

In reality, I wouldn’t care if Leeds had that poo emoji as a badge, as long as they get promoted to the Premier League!

Posted by sean on February 20, 2019 at 9:32 am in Leeds United, Wedding with No Comments


* Second only to mine.

This is quite simply brilliant. Credit and congrats to the groom, @Jack_Nichol, who uploaded the video and allowed me to use it on my blog.

Luckily, when I married Claire in 2015, Marcelo Bielsa was not Leeds United manager.

The man in charge at the time was Neil Redfearn, who had just guided Leeds to the dizzy heights of 15th in the league.

Had I mentioned Neil Redfearn in my wedding speech, I would have had one of the shortest marriages in history – and not just because he was awful for Leeds.

‘Redders’ was sacked 11 days later.

Posted by sean on February 19, 2019 at 7:47 pm in Have I Got News For You with No Comments


When I first saw the below tweet, I assumed that, as a major news website and paper had decided to report on the subject, Jack Whitehall must have said something outrageous.

What could Jack have said – something along the lines of this?

Brexit is a f***ing waste of time and Teresa May is a useless c***!

Nope. It was nothing like that. According to the Mirror website – the same place behind the lion pe*is story.

Jack Whitehall was forced to apologise for his language after saying the word p***ed during an interview on Lorraine

Wash your mouth out with soap and water, Jack.

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