Sean's Stories

Posted by sean on December 7, 2019 at 11:09 pm in Bath City, Leeds United with No Comments


Over four and a half years ago, Bath City took on a little-known team from Essex called Concord Rangers.

City held onto a 1-0 scoreline for much of the game and it looked like they would take all three points.

Unfortunately, Concord equalised late into the match. What can I say? It happens. Considering that this took place almost five years ago and the result had no significant impact on the season, I feel that I have got over it!

I can’t really remember much about the game at all, apart from one incident involving their manager, Danny Cowley. Upon witnessing his team equalise, Concord’s boss ran to the Bath City bench, before spotting Twerton Park legend, Jim Rollo, and shouting like a yob, “I remember you! You’re a c**t!”

I remember you too, Danny.

I am sure you will agree, that kind of behaviour is disgusting – especially when addressing a hero like Jim Rollo. Sorry, Sir Jim Rollo.

Why am I bringing all of this back up now? Well, since that dark day of obscene profanity, Danny Cowley has been doing rather well for himself, progressing from club to club, climbing the football pyramid and his own career ladder. Despite his previous indiscretion, I can bring myself to congratulate the man on his achievements.

It just so happens, that this afternoon, Mr Cowley finally got the chance to take on my other team – Leeds United.

The former-Concord boss is now managing Huddersfield Town. Anyone who knows about football, or geography for that matter, will be aware that this is a local fixture for Leeds.

These derbies can be notoriously difficult, despite the fact Leeds are having a superb season, and Huddersfield are struggling.

Leeds thankfully won the game, to return to the top of the league.

How did Danny Cowley react? Did he call the world-famous Leeds manager, Marcelo Bielsa, a bad four-letter word?

Of course not…

Arse kisser Cowley. *

* admittedly, given the chance, I would kiss Marcelo Bielsa’s behind too.

Posted by sean on December 2, 2019 at 10:32 pm in Leeds United with No Comments


It was bound to happen sooner or later. Leeds drawn to play Arsenal in the FA Cup.

There was a period a few years ago, where it felt as if both teams were drawn against each other every season.

The last few times, Arsenal eventually overcame Leeds, despite my beloved Whites pushing them mighty close on occasions.

I don’t know how to feel about this one. I’ll say this very quietly… I don’t even know how much I want Leeds to win! This may sound totally absurd, but let me explain…

Leeds are doing really well in the league this season. You know the league? The competition that I banged on about throughout all last year – crowing how well Leeds were doing, until they buggered it all up, in a frustratingly predictable fashion.

I am hoping that this season, things may be different and Leeds will finish the job and BLOODY WELL GET PROMOTED! That means no distractions, including any exciting runs in the cup.

Therefore, a narrow win for Arsenal would not be the end of the world. As the popular terrace chant goes “One nil, to the Arsenal”. I’d accept that, on the condition that it is “Twenty nil, to the Leeds United” in the following fixture.

On the other side of the metaphorical football coin, a win for Leeds is never a bad thing. In that spirit, here are a few of my favourite moments involving Leeds and Arsenal, from days gone by…

 

My favourite goal scored by a Leeds player, against Arsenal in my lifetime. While this goal saved Leeds from relegation, it unfortunately awarded Manchester United the league title.

 

Believe it or not, Leeds were once a pretty good team. They even won the FA Cup in 1972 – coincidentally their fellow finalists were Arsenal. Listen out for the greatest line of football commentary ever “Clarke… one nil!”

 

Predictably, Leeds got their comeuppance.
Arsenal, or rather Thierry Henry, dished out a harsh lesson in
revenge…

Posted by sean on November 3, 2019 at 7:36 pm in Leeds United with No Comments


As a Leeds supporter, I haven’t had much to crow about over the years. On the rare occasion things seem to be going well, something always seems to come along and mess things up – more often than not, not directly related to football.

The latest interruption to a bit of potential success, is sadly a worrying and serious one. As seems to be occurring all too regularly in football nowadays, racism has lured its ugly head.

However, unlike other stories involving this hate crime, the supporters are thankfully not involved.

Leeds United’s Spanish goalkeeper, Kiko Casilla, has been accused of racially abusing a Charlton Athletic player during a recent match.

The football club and FA are currently investigating, although a verdict is yet to be reached.

Despite this, an “exclusive” on the racism story was published on Saturday – ironically by everyone’s favourite politically incorrect rag The Daily Mail.

The accusation, of course, must be treated extremely seriously. Unlike The Daily Heil, I won’t be speculating on the events. I have also decided to not to provide a link to the story.

I am content to allow The FA to carry out their investigation. As for the verdict, assuming Casilla is found guilty of racism, with indisputable evidence against him, he will be banned for a large number of games.

I am of the belief, and reading social media, many fellow Leeds fans agree; that should there be a guilty verdict, the player should be sacked with immediate effect.

There is no place for racism in football and although a ban would see the accused not playing for Leeds, for a very long time; I do not feel it would be right for him to return after he has served his ban.

If you or I were to racially abuse a colleague, associate or customer at work, we would be sacked – and rightly so. Why should footballers be an exception to the rule?

On the other hand, should Casilla be found not to have committed an act of racism, the club and supporters need to fully support him, in moving on from the accusations, which would no doubt have affected him mentally.

I would also like to see Leeds United sue The Daily Mail for Saturday’s article, which would clearly have been lies. Remember, this is IF he is found NOT GUILTY.

Thankfully, Leeds beat QPR this weekend, meaning that at least things are going well from the football side of things.

Posted by sean on October 20, 2019 at 11:42 pm in Leeds United with No Comments


As a football club, what is the best way to celebrate your 100th birthday?

Obvious. Fleece your loyal supporters for every penny they have.

How do you do this? How about selling a commemorative shirt, that most fans would have to sell their own mums to afford.

Justify the very high price tag, by saying it’s “limited edition”.

Ironically, 100 years ago, £149 would buy you the fancy shirt, a book AND the player modelling it.

So “limited edition” was this shirt, that they were sold out by the time I had even started online window shopping. Proof that Leeds United either have some very wealthy fans, or a group of supporters who have a lot of explaining to, when Daddy asks if Mummy has cooked tea yet (no sexism intended).

Never mind – they’re on eBay* – the guaranteed place for a bargain…
* the shirts, not the mothers of Leeds fans.

Incidentally, if you want to buy a 200th anniversary shirt in the Year 2119, they’ll set you back £51k.

Overpriced memorabilia aside, I am sure all Leeds fans (myself included) wanted was a win this weekend…

With all the hype – and my God, there was hype – surrounding the centenary weekend, it was inevitable that Leeds would lose their match against Birmingham.

As sure as night follows day, that fixture had a one nil defeat written all over it. If Leeds United have taught me one thing, it’s that Leeds United are masters at fecking things up for themselves.

Amazingly, it was Leeds who won 1-0, ensuring the plan of fleecing the fans worked brilliantly. The supporters were pleased, which meant they no doubt spent even more money on food, drink and merchandise. This, in turn, made the owner pleased.

Everyone went home happy. Well, almost everyone…

Before you judge, this is Birmingham fans. No Leeds supporter was involved.

Apparently, The Brummie Army, or whatever they are calling themselves, were not too happy about losing to Leeds.

I suppose they naturally thought that Leeds would piss all over their own special day, gifting Birmingham a win. They obviously got a bit upset when things didn’t go to plan…

Maybe they were just sad about having to return to Birmingham and were having a temper tantrum – like a toddler in Asda. I can’t say that I blame them. I’d rather go to Syria, than The Bullring.

So, that’s that for another 100 years. Same time next Centenary?

Posted by sean on October 17, 2019 at 11:07 pm in Leeds United with No Comments


It’s Leeds United’s birthday today!

They have reached the big 100.

One hundred years old and Leeds are rotting in the second tier of English ⁷football.

Leeds are like a dear elderly relative in a depressing nursing home. Awful…

It is sad to see one of your loved ones, wandering through life, oblivious of everyone and everything around them, with no day-to-day plan, or what’s going on in general. Old age has left them confused, with a permanent aroma of excrement, which is impossible to hide, despite the best efforts of those around them. This is the state Leeds United have found themselves in… your relative probably doesn’t have half of these problems!

I wonder if Leeds got a telegram from The Queen?

Ever wondered what Her Majesty writes in the telegram?

Congratulations. It’s your birthday,
It’s time for lots of fun.
So roll this card up nice and tight
And stick it up your bum.

So now you know.

The English Football League wished Leeds a happy birthday, using social media. Given the club’s strained relationship with the EFL, such a move was never going to be a good idea – clearly somebody will be receiving their P45.

Here are just some of the predictable replies from Leeds fans…

Sums up the birthday rather well.

To non-football fans, or maybe even supporters of clubs who haven’t suffered dark days, Leeds United can best be compared to being in an abusive relationship. A relationship with a billionaire, who will buy you anything you desire. A relationship with the most incredible lover ever, who you share incredible sexual experiences with. A relationship where your billionaire partner regularly cheats on you. A relationship where, if you question where they have been, or have the audacity to breath in front of them, while they’re annoyed, they beat you black and blue.

Basically, supporting Leeds is like living with an amazing partner, who at times, brings you unprecedented joy; but is also capable of making your life a living hell.

That is my Leeds United in a nutshell.

Happy birthday, you loveable, horrible old bastard.

I would like to make it clear, that despite what I have written above, it should not all be taken literally. Old age is a serious problem in society and dementia is a terrible disease for those suffering from the condition, as well as their loved ones. Finally, domestic violence is abhorrent and while I used it in an attempt to describe how it feels to be a Leeds supporter, for the victims, nothing is comparable to the torture they live with day by day.

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