Sean's Stories

Posted by sean on February 14, 2019 at 3:53 pm in Leeds United with No Comments

Is it just me, or has anyone else thought that the lyrics to Leeds United’s club anthem, ‘Marching on Together’, would make an excellent message for a Valentine’s Day card?

Posted by sean on February 14, 2019 at 7:18 am in Leeds United with No Comments

Leeds beat Swansea last night, to go top of the Championship. You will therefore be surprised that this blog does not involve me singing from the rooftops.

I hate this season. It is far too stressful, competing for promotion. It was a lot easier when Leeds were crap. You knew where you were being rubbish… at home, 1-0 down to Blackburn, after 18 seconds.

Last night, Leeds found themselves winning 2-0 before half time and playing very well. I was pleased and could almost relax. After all, being in-front by two gosls meant that Swansea had to score a couple themselves, in order to ruin the rest of my week.

However, nothing is ever simple with Leeds United. I am sure that there is a sweepstake going on between the players, as to how many supporters they can kill off, due to stress, before the end of the season. They probably came close to knocking off a few of us, last night…

Towards the end of the match, a totally pointless penalty was given away by Leeds, to a stunned, and hopefully very grateful, Swansea.

There was absolutely no need for the Leeds player to go anywhere near his Welsh counterpart – you could almost say it was an early Valentine’s Day gift. If it was a romantic present from the Leeds defender – which wouldn’t surprise me – the Swansea player who won the spot kick, certainly owes him something in return!

I’m hardly one to play cupid, but I suggest the lucky Swansea player treats the generous Leeds hunk to a romantic meal, in a classy restaurant. Follow up the evening, by taking him to a five-star hotel, for a night of Isaac Hayes music and love. Heck, why not get engaged? What a perfect day for it!

Going back to the game – the penalty was converted (of course it fecking was), bringing the scoreline to 2-1. This resulted in an agonising, final 10 minutes for me, watching from the sofa. I should probably have been watching from behind it!

The match finished 2-1. Leeds had won, but the stress it had caused, didn’t leave me feeling very happy! I did not enjoy the experience at all.

I think my mood, during the remaining moments of the game, is best demonstrated by Homer Simpson…


Posted by sean on February 12, 2019 at 11:24 pm in Football, Leeds United with No Comments

I have a noisy neighbour. No, not a residential one. The only person living next door to Claire and I, is an old dear, who keeps herself to herself and never makes a sound. She’s lovely and the ideal neighbour for two Millennials, who prefer an evening in front of the television with a takeaway, instead of attending a nightclub until 4 in the morning and vomiting in a taxi, on the journey home. I think she likes us too. When we first met, Claire and I were asked if we ever played music. Unless you count listening to Marching on Together (me), or The Greatest Showman soundtrack (Claire) – both using our mobile phones – no, we never play music.

The noisy neighbour concerning me, is of the football variety – Bristol City FC. ‘The Robins’ play in the same league as my team, Leeds United. While they are not  geographical neighbours of my Yorkshire-based club, they are located too close to comfort, when it comes to where I live! I know a number of their fans and the club seems to forever be on the local news.

The bad thing about Bristol City being on the local news? The same negative about my other team, Bath City, featuring in the local press and television… non-football fans, approaching me to discuss the sport, because they have seen it on HTV News at tea time, or read a match report in The Bath Chronicle.

These non-football fans normally always attempt to start a discussion with me, after hearing or reading news about Bath City – this is nornally negative news, involving a heavy defeat, cup exit, relegation, liquidation, or stadium being burnt to the ground!

I can deal with proper football supporters attempting to wind me up – I’m a Leeds fan and the last 15 years have been shit. There is nothing which can be said to me about Leeds, that I haven’t heard before.

When a colleague, friend or family member (quite often my Mum), asks me about Bath City’s latest humiliating defeat, it is one of the most annoying things ever! The person asking me to discuss a topic, such as my football team losing, is just trying to be nice, or start a friendly chat. I can hardly tell them to shut up – that would be very rude – or reply, saying their team is crap – they don’t support anyone.

I know that I am waffling here, so will try to get to the point…

Bristol City are doing very well. They have won 9 games in a row. How in the hell they have done this, I have no idea! If people could write whatever they like on the internet, without getting sued, I would suggest that the players should be  tested for drugs. However, as it is possible to be sued for libel, and Bristol City’s millionaire owner can probably afford a better lawyer than me, I must strongly stress that this was all a rubbish joke, for the purpose of my blog, and under no circumstances have ANY Bristol City players EVER taken any illegal or banned substances. The only druggy here is me, having scored some ‘Ket‘, the last time I was hanging around Southmead.

No, I have no idea why Bristol City are doing so well. My worry is that they will catch Leeds, who are currently 2nd. Some people may scoff at this fear – Bristol are in 5th place and 5 points behind Leeds – but back in November, the last time City lost a game (ironically to Leeds), they were 11 places and 11 points behind the ‘Mighty Whites’. Now do you see my worry?

Just look at this run of victories. It’s so good that it’s almost cheating! Why can’t Leeds do this? It’s not fair.

If the worst happens and The Robins do fly past Leeds, spraying bird shit all over them in the process, it will, without doubt, be all over the local rags and news…

All my Bristol City supporting friends will laugh – they would be within their rights to, and I can handle their ‘banter’ (sorry, I hate that word).

Those who will mention the subject, and as a result, really get to me, will be the innocent, oblivious ones – my great aunt Wendy, the office weirdo everyone tries to avoid at the photocopier and Luke, who I haven’t seen since infants school, but for some reason searched on Facebook and added me as a “friend” – something which, in any other instance, would be classed as stalking, but is accepted on social media.

For the record, I have no relative known as Wendy, there’s no single office weirdo (we’re all barmy), and I don’t use my Facebook account. If I did, I certainly wouldn’t add potential murderers like Luke.

I can predict what will be said. All deadly serious and with no intention to upset or anger me…

  • “Is this bad news for Leeds?”
  • “Does this mean Bristol City are better than Leeds?”
  • “How did this happen? I always thought Bristol City were rubbish”
  • “Why can’t you both win the league? You could share it.”
  • “When will Leeds get to play Bath City?”
  • “I know – you could start supporting Bristol City now”

Someone is guaranteed to mention that last one. All perfectly innocently. I will punch a wall when they do…
Note to self: ensure you punch any walls with your left hand.

Posted by sean on February 8, 2019 at 10:32 pm in Leeds United with No Comments

So, the Leeds United “spying” scandal keeps dragging on.

This is the latest statement from the English Football League (EFL)…

At its meeting on Friday afternoon, the EFL Board (*excluding representatives of the Championship) considered the matter of the incident in the vicinity of Derby County’s training ground on Thursday, January 10.

Following a comprehensive review of all available evidence, it was determined that there remain a number of areas that require further exploration and clarification and these investigations will take place at the earliest opportunity.

An update on this matter will be provided following receipt and analysis of those subsequent enquiries and until this point no further comment will be made.


Blah, blah, blah, blah! Sorry if you decided to read all of that.

The spying accusations were first made 4 weeks ago! In this time, I have managed to break my own leg, have it repaired and teach myself to walk on it again. It would appear the EFL have done bugger all…

There shouldn’t even be anything to discuss. Leeds have not committed any crime. Let’s all move on, forget about it, go home and eat jam sandwiches. The EFL are making this out to be as big and important as Brexit – they’re certainly being as slow to resolve the issue, as our government is to arranging a deal to leave the EU.

If I was a sceptical man, I would say that all of this stalling, in resolving the spying saga, is to unsettle Leeds United Football Club, who are performing surprisingly well this season. Leeds are the EFL’s goose, which lays the golden egg. If this goose flies to the Premier League, at the end of the season, where are the golden eggs going to come from? Yeovil? Forest Green? By unsettling the football club, it could be perceived as clipping the goose’s wings – therefore preventing it from flying away. Of course, this is only what a sceptical man might think. I’m not one of those, so I don’t believe a word of it and neither should you.

Posted by sean on January 12, 2019 at 8:42 am in Leeds United with No Comments

It’s never a dull moment at Leeds United

Guess what? I know the culprit…

One of the best things about stories like this, is the way the internet reacts to the news.

Here are some of the best tweets on Twitter, from amused Leeds supporters, bitter Derby fans and an excellent cartoonist…

  • About Me

    So you stumbled across my blog. No doubt after searching for something bizarre on Google. Before you hit that 'Back Button', why not stay and have a read for a few minutes?

    If you are after a website which gives advice on how to hack an iPhone X, download the latest Steven Seagal movie, or view nudy ladies, you've come to the wrong place and may now press 'Back'.

    However, if you would like a lifestyle blog, written by a 30-something chap, living in Bath (England), feast your eyes on this.

    You won't discover how to copy PlayStation 4 games. What you will find is a blog, covering life in the West Country, the highs and lows of supporting two unsuccessful football teams, while sharing a house with a wife and rabbit.

    All written by a man, somewhere on the sanity-scale between normal and eccentric.
  • Archives