Sean's Stories

Posted by sean on September 23, 2017 at 9:47 pm in Leeds United with No Comments


… except we’re not. Leeds are still top of the league.

It is, of course, a team effort. However, one important cog in the team is this man – Samuel Saiz…

We’ve got Saiz
Samuel Saiz
I just don’t think you understand
He came from sunny Spain
To get Leeds up again
We’ve got Samuel Saiz

Posted by sean on September 21, 2017 at 10:40 pm in Pizza with No Comments


I learnt a lesson yesterday. Don’t overcook pizza. I made that mistake. The crust became so baked that it could not be cut with a standard knife – a saw would have been more appropriate.

Things got worse, when I bit into the pizza. Such was the density of my meal, that the replacement chip on my front tooth, which I damaged as a child, fell out. That’s another trip to the dentist for me…

Posted by sean on September 20, 2017 at 10:33 pm in Leeds United with No Comments


After bravely overcoming Burnley, last night, Leeds were in the hat for the next round of the cup.

Their opposition… Leicester City. Meh.

A good draw, really. You may have noticed we are doing rather well in the league, at the moment… this leads me onto a joke I’ll tell shortly. The fact Leeds are 1st in the league – yes, TOP – means we don’t want any distraction. Leicester are not a massive club, the game is winnable and there will be no shame should we lose.

Now my joke…

WIFE: “Have you seen the TV remote?”

HUSBAND: “It’s in the same place as Leeda”

WIFE: “Where’s that?”

HUSBAND: “On top of the table!”

Goodnight, everybody!

Posted by sean on September 15, 2017 at 8:43 am in Work Activities with No Comments


My colleagues in the neighbouring office are discussing what bird of prey is the easiest to train. 

Posted by sean on September 5, 2017 at 5:52 pm in Work Activities with No Comments


I suffered a terrible accident yesterday. I know that last sentence makes it sounds like I lost a limb. It wasn’t that bad, but not far off. When opening my backpack, to get my lunch, I discovered lots of fluid. I initially thought that my orange had gone mouldy and imploded into itself. What I discovered was a lot worse than a citrus fruit, which had gone bad. My can of cherry coke had exploded. A gaping hole on the top of the can, caused the contents to spill absolutely everywhere.

As I pulled the contents from my backpack, coke spilt everywhere – all over me, all over the desk, all over the floor. A puddle was quickly growing on the carpet, making it look like an elderly relative had paid a visit and failed to make it to the toilet in time. Luckily, all this occurred in my old team’s office, where I decided to eat my lunch that afternoon. Therefore, I avoided upsetting my new team in the neighbouring area.

To get my coke fix, I asked a colleague to buy me a bottle of drink. Remarkably, this was spilt all over my desk. when I knocked it with my arm, later that day. I think from now on I should only be allowed to drink from a baby’s beaker.

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