Sean's Stories

Posted by sean on January 23, 2020 at 11:49 pm in Fun At Home, Roman's Album with No Comments


Claire enjoys watching wrestling on TV while eating her tea. I do not.

It transpires that our house rabbit, Roman, shares my wife’s passion for an evening meal accompaniment, involving half naked men and women fighting in the name of scripted combat.

Not being a fan of the sport – despite owning numerous wrestling figures when I was aged 7, and WWE was known as WWF – this new shared interest between my wifey and bunny, has left me feeling a little left out.

Posted by sean on January 22, 2020 at 10:28 pm in Football with No Comments


Now is not a great time to be a Leeds fan…

The team is playing crap…

They seem to lose to rubbish opposition every week…

There are even problems with some of the supporters, embarrassing themselves and the club, by behaving like dickheads online…

Still, it could be worse…

Posted by sean on January 21, 2020 at 9:04 am in Fast Food with No Comments


Claire and I were finally able to order the new Burger King Rebel Whopper and have it delivered, to consume in the privacy of our own home.

I have been excited about eating one of these for over a year, after reading about a plant-based burger, which tastes identical to meat.

Since turning veggie for ethical reasons 18 months ago, there have been few meats that I have missed. However, burgers have been my weakness, trying to tempt me back into eating flesh.

So, was the Rebel meaty enough? Did it taste like the beefy Whopper, I so fondly remember from my meat-munching days? Yes and yes.

I have never been a big consumer of meat, so even before deciding to change to an out-and-out vegetarian, I had over 30 years experience of eating veggie burgers, Quorn and Linda McCartney products.

This is partly thanks to my Mum, who is also a vegetarian, or at least she claims to be. She eats fish – a food which I have always found repulsive.

If I’m feeling mischievous, I will ask my Mother why she believes that a pig should have its life spared, but is happy for an innocent mackerel to be murdered, just so she can get her fix of flesh.

In her defense, she is very strict when it comes to avoiding the consumption of animals which lack the ability to swim. Don’t ask me for her stance on eating duck.

I have never known my Mum to eat red meat. In fact, I was rarely fed any during my childhood. I suspect that this could be due to her having health concerns, relating to its consumption. It took her until 2018 to trust beef again, following the Mad Cow Disease scandal of the 1980s.

While many meat imitations came close to the taste of beef, pork and chicken, I could always tell that they were fake – until yesterday. The Rebel looks, smells and tastes like meat. I just hope that I wasn’t given some of poor Daisy’s rump by mistake.

Finally, I am aware that the Rebel is cooked on the same grill as its fleshy counterparts. This has understandably bothered many vegetarians and vegans – although offending the latter is as easy as shooting fish in a barrel. Even that phrase would no doubt cause offence – “Fish are people, too!”.

I am not troubled by the cooking technique. Whenever you eat out or order a takeaway, you don’t know what goes on behind the closed doors of the kitchen.

When ordering your vegetarian pizza, how do you know that it has been cooked in a separate location to the meat pizzas?

Can you be sure the chef preparing your margherita has changed his gloves since handling the pepperoni? You can’t.

The only way to be certain that your food doesn’t come into contact with meat, is to just eat in vegetarian establishments, or better still, only consume what you cook at home.

If this attitude makes me a bad vegetarian, call me Desperate Dan and bake me a cow pie!

SO MEATY, THE BURGER EVEN WENT “MOO!”.

Posted by sean on January 20, 2020 at 5:18 pm in Fun At Home, Rabbits with No Comments


A little pressie arrived for Claire this morning.

The gift, arranged by yours truly, was delivered by a courier who, instead of ringing the doorbell like a normal person, bashed our door as if they were a police officer executing a raid on a drugs den.

As startled as Claire and I were by the assault on the entrance to our home, Roman was terrified. His fear only escalated when my wife answered the door and collected her surprise – a bouquet of heart-shaped balloons.

There is a saying – “Every day is a school day” – presumably because we learn something new during each 24-hour period. Today I learned that rabbits are petrified of balloons – well, our bunny is.

Roman hated the present I bought for Claire. The balloons were placed in the corner of the front room, slowly moving in the air.

Presumably, in the eyes of our furry little cherub, these strange and scary foreign objects were monsters. Hungry monsters with a taste for rabbit meat.

After a failed attempt to ease Romy’s fears, by moving the floating predators into the kitchen (he spotted them through the windows on the door), calm was restored when they were dragged upstairs to the bedroom.

There is now a significant risk that Claire will trip over the balloons in the dark and end up joining me in the Broken Bones Club; but at least our pet rabbit will be happy…

Posted by sean on January 19, 2020 at 10:32 pm in Video Games with No Comments


Like me, you have probably noticed that it isn’t unusual to see very young children playing on iPads, Fire tablets and the like.

Is this the norm these days?

It amuses me how there are no doubt one-year-old babies, who know more about using an iPad than their 60-year-old granddad.

I remember showing my parents how to set the timer on the video recorder, but I had at least started school by then!

The reason for this blog, is because my Mum found one of my favourite childhood toys in her loft.

Unlike kids toys of today, mine didn’t run on batteries. There wasn’t even a USB port!

Introducing, the car mat…

I PREDICT THE CAR MAT TO MAKE A COMEBACK, AND BE THE ‘MUST HAVE’ TOY OF CHRISTMAS 2020!

I had endless hours of fun with my mat and collection of toy cars – most likely Hot Wheels and Micro Machines. I guess today’s equivalent of this is Grand Theft Auto 5.

A MAP FROM GRAND THEFT AUTO. BASICALLY THE SAME AS MY CAR PLAY MAT.

I would like to say that I lovingly played with that car mat into my teenage years, but I soon discovered Sega…

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