Posted by sean on March 15, 2014 at 10:07 pm in Ventures Outside Of Bath with No Comments


Last night, I went with Claire and her parents to a pub in Keynsham for a meal. This was to celebrate both my birthday (belatedly) and her mum’s (ahead of next week). For those of you who don’t know the place, Keynsham is situated halfway between Bath and Bristol. It is not as classy as Bath and not as rough as Bristol. The posh Keynsham residents will boast to be closer to Bath, while the riff-raff will no doubt claim to be Bristolian. As somebody who lives in Bath, I can say, one hundred percent, that Keynsham as not linked to our city in anyway, and is a place in its own right. However, we do share the same useless council – Bath and North East Somerset.

The meal was nice. After eating a pie and drinking a pint of Thatchers AND white wine (that’s not a Bristolian cocktail, it was a pint of cider and a small glass of wine, which was free), I needed a piss. I made my way to the toilets. They were surprisingly clean. I was all ready to commend the cleaner on an excellent piece of urinal scrubbing, when I noticed something horrific in the cubical. A turd. Not just a turn in the toilet bowl which had not flushed properly, a turd on the floor! Disgusting. To make matters worse, it’s creator had not shat it onto the floor. To make things EVEN worse, he (or possibly she) had crapped it into toilet paper, wrapped it up like a burrito (which, ironically is what Claire had for her meal) and carefully placed it onto the tiled ground. Nice.

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