Posted by sean on October 30, 2010 at 12:28 am in Life In Bath with No Comments


There have been many reports in the media recently that Wayne Rooney’s salary of £250,000 is obscene and too much. Having been to town today and observed what everyday people have to pay for basic provisions and services, I’m in the minority that believes Wazza is underpaid.

Bus to town (less than 2 miles) – £3.20. For a few pence more, I could have bought a horse driven carriage. Upon my arrival, I could even have asked the driver to kill the horse, which took me to my destination and put it in between two slices of bread – very continental and all for under four quid. Instead I sat on a damp bus, surrounded by old people and their whimpering dogs. For the record,  I didn’t eat the dog or any pensioners.

Dentists. 2 minutes in the chair, no work required – £16.50 – and that’s with an NHS dentist! I haven’t been for 3 years. I have been avoiding the dentist in recent times, as I was always sent to the hygienist who found it necessary to cut my mouth to pieces and charged me £50 for the privilege. Ironically, despite my recent abscondence, the dentist found no problems with my current set of gnashers and didn’t refer me for further treatment… expect to my bank manager.

Scarves. After leaving the dental surgery it rained. I randomly found myself in a shop looking for a scarf which would keep me dry and warm from the elements. Price = £50. Needless to say, I didn’t buy it. Instead I ran away from the shop, embarrassed and crying, as an overdressed shop assistant asked if he could help me. It was obvious I wasn’t an upperclass, silk-scarf wearing yuppie. My Bath City FC scarf will have to be sufficient this winter.

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