Posted by sean on December 14, 2018 at 11:53 pm in Leeds United with No Comments


Being a football fan generally involves experiencing a mix of joy and misery. Depending on who you support, you may experience more or less of one of these emotions. I support Leeds United, so primarily receive enough misery to make Mr Happy turn to the Stella.

This season, however, has been a little different. Leeds have been doing rather well. They currently sit in the automatic promotion places, which they have occupied since August. This level of success is a very unfamiliar feeling, but I like it!

I keep telling myself that the good days won’t last and things will all fall apart. This is yet to happen.

until now…

This evening, I read this. Samuel Saiz looks like he’s leaving Elland Road – the home of Leeds United. We have lots of good players, but Saiz is one of them. Despite the wealth of talent, I’m still worried. If you owned a Ferrari, you know it would have lots of good parts. If you sold one of these parts to Bob from Honda – for example, a wheel – the Ferrari wouldn’t work like before.

It sounds like Leeds don’t have much of a say in the matter. If you believe what fans are saying on Twitter, his girlfriend is fed up of living in Leeds and wants to move back to Spain.

The manager of Spanish football club, Getafe, is interested. Not in Samuel’s girlfriend, although I’m sure she’s pleasent enough. No, he allegedly wants one of our best players. What a ****.

As the girlfriend rumour is on social media, it must be true. Although if Mr Saiz’s lawyer is reading this, it is all lies.

It all seems a bit strange. Why would the future Mrs Saiz possibly want to move here?

Especially with such fantastic locations in Leeds…

It’s a mystery.

Oh, and before anyone from Leeds goes batshit crazy at my blog, it’s a JOKE. Granted, it’s about as funny as Miranda Hart, but is still not to be taken seriously.

There are lots of wonderful spots in Leeds. For example…

I live in Bath. There’s a lot of crap locations here, I can assure you. Take a look at this dump…

Finally, before any fan of Bath Rugby goes batshit crazy at my blog, I really don’t care.

Goodnight.

Posted by sean on December 13, 2018 at 11:20 pm in Video Games with No Comments


It was last night when I realised that I may be taking Red Dead Redemption 2 a little too seriously…

I had just completed a mission – the last one, before going to bed. The mission involved protecting a woman and her boyfriend, by boarding a steam train with them and shooting all the bad guys on horseback, who pursued the locomotive with the intention of killing everyone. Just your typical Monday morning commute from Bath Spa to Bristol Temple Meads.

After disposing of the baddies and safely driving the train to a station (I thought the lead character was a cowboy, not Superman), the grateful woman offers my character a gift to say thank you. The present is a bracelet, which she tells me is a family heirloom. You must then choose whether or not to accept the piece of jewellery. I accepted the bracelet.

Despite the woman continuing to thank me, before leaving and the mission ending (mercifully allowing me to save my progress and go to bed), I felt guilty. That’s right, guilty. Guilty for accepting a gift from an imaginary character in a video game!

What makes my feeling of guilt even more stupid, are the other acts I perform in the game. I do not have a second thought, when it comes to looting shop keepers, blowing the heads off innocent men on horseback and shooting a farmer’s livestock (in my defence, I ate the beef and mutton, I acquired as a result of my crime).

I have been slightly reassured, that while the game has given me faux guilt, many fellow gamers have been affected by RDR2 a lot worse than by some fuss over a bracelet.

Here are a few of my favourite posts from a Reddit forum. The thread in question is titled “This game is NOT good for addictive personalities.

I’ve been staying up until 2am practically every night since release day, playing the whole day on days off from work.

It seems like every minute I’m at home, I’m playing. I happily trade sleep for more time in-game no matter how early I need to be up for work the next day

Me every weekend: “I’ll only play for like an hour or two honey.”

“Crap it’s 4am”

Posted by sean on December 12, 2018 at 10:55 pm in Politics with No Comments


So Teresa lives to fight another day.

I bet she is a little disappointed to still be in a job. A small part of her was probably looking for spending a morning in Wetherspoons, drinking endless glasses of cheap wine.

Posted by sean on December 10, 2018 at 11:47 pm in Politics with No Comments


Despite taking a bit of an interest in some aspects of politics (I’m no Andrew Marr), until today I have never watched a House of Commons debate.

I came home from work, to find Claire watching BBC Politics. Again, like me, she hasn’t watched the channel before – at least not without my knowledge.

The debate focused on the ongoing saga of Brexit. Honestly, this has dragged on longer than all the Star Wars movies, and cost a hell of a lot more money.

To my inexperienced House of Commons mind, it appeared that many of the MPs wanted to vote on the Brexit deal. Teresa May then decided to call the vote off. Probably because she knew all too well that she wouldn’t win.

That’s a great way to avoid defeat, Prime Minister. Leeds United are due to play Bolton at the weekend. If the players just don’t turn up and say that they don’t want to play, will they be awarded the win? If we’re following the PM’s rules, yes. Sorry, Bolton.

Another observation that I made is that Mrs May will do whatever she can to avoid answering a tough question. I know that everyone jokes about politicians doing this, but it really is true!

A Labour MP asked the PM what she would like to say to her constituents, who voted leave, based upon promises which will not be delivered. May didn’t answer. Instead, she reeled off some bollocks about how she has spoken to lots of people, who voted remain, that now want to leave. Now, I’m not calling our respectable Prime Minister a liar, but if she was related to Pinocchio, her nose would have grown so long that it would have stretched across Westminster Bridge.

Her response hasn’t even got anything to do with the issue posed to her in the first place! Again, using ‘Teresa Logic’ in another situation, imagine that you are on Who Wants to be a Millionaire. You’re one step away from the top prize, but have used all your lifelines. You are asked the question “The Koran is divided into 114 sections – what are these known as?”. You respond “The cow goes ‘mooo!'”. Congratulations – you’re a millionaire!

Finally, many of the MPs are bloody rude. Like I have already said, I haven’t watched a debate from the House of Commons before, so don’t know if this happens all the time (but suspect it does). One speaker stood up to make a point, to which a rude bastard in the background shouted out “get on with it!”.

Given how unpleasant they all are, I don’t understand why they call each other “the right honourable”. Why are they not just honest and address each other as “C*nty McC*ckhead”?

The other MPs are no better than the “get on with it” moron. Those not heckling each other, are mostly on their mobile phones! That is, of course, the politicians who had bothered to stay behind to finish the debate. By 6pm, most appeared to have buggered off! Presumably to get home in time to listen to the remainder of the debate on Radio 4, or more likely watch Married to the Eiffel Tower, on Channel 5 – and yes, that is a real documentary

Posted by sean on December 9, 2018 at 7:40 pm in Football with No Comments


I was more than a little disappointed to hear that Liverpool forward, Mohamed Salah, scored a hat trick against Bournemouth on Saturday (although probably not as disappointed as the club’s manager, Eddie Howe).

The reason for my disappointment is all because of fantasy football. Unlike many fellow “FFers”, who took to Twitter to air their frustrations, I actually left Mo in my team. The problem was that I dropped him as my captain, for the first time this season.

Salah scored a hat trick, which means loads of points for me. Had I kept the faith and retained him as my captain, I would have won double points. Damn and blast!

 

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