It looks like Dan will be spending tonight at my house after he chose me to put him up for the night. That is all well and good, I have no problem with people staying over at mine, it’s just Dan… well… he doesn’t exactly like sleeping on mattresses, sofas or spare beds.
Like a cat or a dog, he likes to climb into other peoples beds for nothing more than warmth and a comfortable night’s sleep. I do not know where this bizarre quirk started, but everyone who has ever invited Dan to spend a night at theirs has experienced this.
I am slightly worried that Dan will try to sleep in my bed tonight, something I do not really want. I have made his airbed as comfy as possible and may make mine as uncomfortable as I can. I have also made a guide for him to read in case he gets confused…
Permitted Sleeping Places
This is Sean’s bed. You may not sleep here.
This is the air mattress. It has been specially prepared for you. You may sleep here.
This is a washing machine. You may sleep here. I cannot guarantee you will fit in or not die.
This is a pile of cardboard boxes on the stairs. Climb inside, they’re warm. 9 out of 10 tramps love them.
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