Posted by sean on May 11, 2009 at 4:57 pm in Football with No Comments



Didhedive Drogba yesterday, after a grasshopper sneezed near the dugout

CHELSEA’S Ivorian striker Didhedive Drogba was again in the news, after Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger accused him of “diving” to earn the free kick which led to Chelsea’s first goal during their 4-1 demolition job at the Emirates Stadium in France yesterday afternoon.

Drogba, 31, did eight spectacular rolls and a face plant before being seen to hold his big toe after a sneeze, believed to be from a mouse or a small shrew, sent the in-form striker tumbling to the ground.

Sky Sports cameramen at the scene however put the blame firmly on a grasshopper, seen in the area of the pitch just before the incident.

It was unavailable for comment this morning. Arsene Wenger, despite not seeing the incident, called Drogba’s behaviour “A f**king disgrace” and recommended he be placed ‘on the sex-offender’s register’.

Drogba, whose real name is Gladys Goosecreature, said after the game “I heard this noise, and I thought I had been shot. It was a grasshopper? No, not possible. Did you see that? Did you? It’s a disgrace. It’s a f**king disgrace”.

Drogba missed the first few games of the season after a European heron dropped a small twig it was carrying back to its nest some 29 miles away, causing him to twist his ankle and give him career-threatening bruises.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

No trackbacks yet.

Posts with similar tags

No post with similar tags yet.

Posts in similar categories

  • About Me

    So you stumbled across my blog. No doubt after searching for something bizarre on Google. Before you hit that 'Back Button', why not stay and have a read for a few minutes?

    If you are after a website which gives advice on how to hack an iPhone X, download the latest Steven Seagal movie, or view nudy ladies, you've come to the wrong place and may now press 'Back'.

    However, if you would like a lifestyle blog, written by a 30-something chap, living in Bath (England), feast your eyes on this.

    You won't discover how to copy PlayStation 4 games. What you will find is a blog, covering life in the West Country, the highs and lows of supporting two unsuccessful football teams, while sharing a house with a wife and rabbit.

    All written by a man, somewhere on the sanity-scale between normal and eccentric.
  • Archives