My final blog post about my cruise – I promise.

Whenever you go on holiday, you will see tourists in football shirts. It’s an almost certain sight and one all the more likely, if you choose to travel to a location visited by the British.

It doesn’t matter if you are visiting a cheap, all inclusive resort in Benidorm, or a remote villa in Tuscany – keep your eye out and sooner rather than later, you won’t be left disappointed. Unless you discover that a family of Chelsea fans are staying in the neighbouring room/villa/caravan/cabin, in which case your holiday is ruined.

Some people clearly believe that if you wear the kit of your team, it automatically makes you the greatest fan of your club – at least in the country you’re visiting.

In some cases, that may be true. For example, if I was to wear a Leeds shirt while visiting The Vatican. Due to the small population, not only would I be the best Leeds supporter, but the only one.

The same can be said if you were to wear a Yeovil Town shirt while in China – for the same reason as in my original example.

Back home in Britain, it’s always nice if you spot someone wearing the shirt of the team you support. This feeling extends to super giddiness, when the same shirt is seen being worn while you are in another country.

To non-football fans, this can best be described by comparing the behaviour of your typical supporters, to that of two dogs, meeting in the park.

Despite not knowing each other and having no sexual attraction, due to being castrated (dogs, not football fans), they go wild – jumping into each other, sniffing the other one’s bottom and barking excessively.

What the dogs are saying, God only knows – probably something like this…

Dog 1: “Hey there! I’m a dog!”
Dog 2: “Wow! I am also a dog!”
Dog 3: “Are you guys dogs?”

You must be wondering where I am going with all this waffle.

Well, despite being a bit chavvy *, I spotted numerous football shirts on the cruise. I kept a list of the offending clubs…
* I wore a football shirt on the ship too, ok. So don’t think I’m being snobbish.

1. Swansea City
2. Middlesbrough
3. Huddersfield Town
4. Coventry City
5. Manchester United **
6. Liverpool (retro shirt)
7. Leeds United – worn by me

• I also think that I spotted somebody in a Bournemouth shirt.
• An honourable mention for a smart Leeds United backpack, which I noticed while going through security.

** like with rats, you’re never more than six feet away from a Manchester United fan.

So that is that. No more blogs about the cruise. Probably…