Italian players were not the only ones to win big last night. The final game of The World Cup secured enough points for me to win the IT Department Fantasy Football League.
It was a close league, but as the World Cup progressed, I climbed the league table and on Saturday night reached the summit before being crowned champion on Sunday.
I expect my prize money to be in the region of £50, which is certainly better than cutting your balls off with a rusty bread knife.
I think this speaks wonders for my football management skills. If Leeds United chairman Ken Bates actually wants his side promoted next season and to be playing in The Champions League shortly after, I am the best man for the job. Also, if Stevie McClaren doesn’t cut the mustard as England manager, I’m available and I won’t charge £5million a year like a dirty, perverted and incompetent Swede.
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