Sean's Stories

Posted by sean on October 24, 2011 at 10:29 pm in Shopping, Trains, Ventures Outside Of Bath with No Comments

I had a 3 day weekend. Saturday was a break from football. Instead I went up to Walsall to see Claire.

I experienced the joys of train journeys. It wasn’t too bad to be honest. During the trip up to the Midlands, I was sat on a carriage full of Bristol Rovers fans. While the Gas Heads drank Natch cider and raved about their chances of promotion, some child played a game on his dad’s iPad. I have no idea what the game was, although it was very loud and very annoying. I was tempted to pick it up and throw it out of the train window (the iPad, not the child). A scary looking notice on the train wall, warning of a £500 fixed penalty fare for anyone throwing anything out of the window was enough to put me off. That notice may have frightened me, but not as much as the one on the escalators – “You will be fined £200 if you stop the escalators for a non-emergency”. The big red button looked so tempting to press!

The trip back was surprisingly easier, despite being warned of the perils of Sunday travel by Simon. There was free WiFi on the train, so I just sat back and streamed the Man United/Man City game on my iPhone. The free internet was the only thing that was free. Even the toilets at Birmingham New Street cost money to get into. 30p! That’s right, thirty pence to have a piss – whatever happened to the phrase “spend a penny”. I would sooner wet myself. Judging by the state of the platform, it looked like a few people already had. Apparently there’s no fine for that.

Today was my day off work. After getting up late, I went into town. Big mistake. It was the half time holiday and every single child from Bath was there with their mothers. My God, they were annoying. They either seemed to be extremely posh and arrogant, or the other extreme and more chavvy than a scouse druggie with 20 kids on The Jeremy Kyle Show.

I was also annoyed during my visit to HMV. I really wanted to buy Jurassic Park on Blu Ray although was unable to find it for sale without the two sequels. Like the follow-ups to Jaws, I like to pretend The Lost World and Jurassic Park 3 don’t exist. If anyone knows where I can buy a copy of the original Jurassic Park movie on Blu Ray, without forking out for the shit spin-offs, please let me know.

After being terrorised by of minors, their parents and HMV sales assistants trying (and failing) to sell my crap dinosaur movies, I treated myself by visiting Krispy Kreme. Those who have visited the place will know how amazing it is. Those who have not haven’t lived. Krispy Kreme sell doughnuts. Not just ordinary doughnuts, the best doughnuts in the entire world. They make all other doughnuts taste like dog poo – they’re THAT good. I enjoyed a ‘Chocolate Sprinkles’ doughnut and a coffee (the hot drinks are also excellent). Another also found its way into my bag, which I ate when I got home.

It’s back to work tomorrow, so I suppose I had better get myself to bed. Hopefully I’ll dream about watching Jurassic Park in high definition while eating at Krispy Kreme; although I‘ll probably have a nightmare about watching The Lost World in a station toilet with football fans and being charged 30p for the privilege.

Posted by sean on July 10, 2010 at 11:32 am in Trains with No Comments

I am currently on the train, making use of the wonderful public transport service made available to the people of Britain.

A few observations on my journey so far…

– Train staff have the biggest egos and attitude problems out of every single profession (with the possible exception of Chelsea football players). Whether it be the poor lady asking what train she should get to Newport, after her original service was cancelled, or in my case, simply ordering a cup of overpriced coffee, everything is too much trouble.

– There is a scruffy drunk a few seats away from me. I can smell him from where I am sat. Earlier on, I listened in on his conversation. He slurred down the phone how he had sorted himself out, although “sometimes” still had a drink, he had enough money despite not working and he was trying to get away without paying for the entire journey. The train we are both on goes to Manchester, where The Jeremy Kyle show is filmed. He is surely going on for a lie detector or DNA test. Jezza will put him in his place.

– The girl in the seat to me has been talking on her phone VERY LOUD to all her mates. Unlike the drunkard, her conversation holds absolutely no interest to me, so I am listening to my iPod to drain out her constant natter. Amazingly, her signal has not dropped out, unlike mine. I really should have got a seat im the quiet carrage, although would probably have found something wrong with that.

– The seat reservation screens broke. Luckily I was in my seat early. Other passangers were not and sat in fellow travellers’ seats. Cue pass mayhem. Entertaining for me.

Posted by sean on August 14, 2005 at 7:03 pm in Curry, Football, Leeds United, Trains with No Comments

Back from my holiday now, the journey down was far more pleasant than the one going up. For the Birmingham to Bristol train we decided to upgrade to First Class to guarantee seats, avoid screaming kids and generally have a more pleasant trip. We were told to board the train as normal and pay the ticket inspector the £15 upgrade fee when asked.

The train was so packed and busy that he simply didn’t have time to bother with billing us so we travelled First Class for the same price as Cattle Class. All in all a good holiday, I have uploaded a collection of holiday snaps here that you can view.

When I got home I was extremely annoyed to find out that all the TV Shows I had set to record on Sky+ had failed – the Leeds-Millwall match, Football League Review and five episodes of Dream Team. The error was solved after ringing the Sky Helpline but sadly all my beloved recordings had been lost! :o(

They say that holidays are supposed to relieve tiredness and help people recharge their batteries, I don’t know about that, I was very tired last night, also deprived of curry which I had not had all week. A delicious takeaway curry from the local Jaflong Indian Restaurant soon sorted that problem out!

Lastly onto football, bit of a disappointing game for Leeds yesterday, they only managed a 0-0 draw against Luton Town. Some fans are saying this is a good result, which in a way is true, Luton’s previous two games were both victories against Southampton and Crystal Palace. I would still have liked to of seen a bit more fight from the players who still seem to struggle to score.

The Leeds strikers couldn’t hit this with a banjo

Some blame can be put onto manager Kevin Blackwell, many are calling for him to be sacked although I am prepared to give him a chance for now. The key to Leeds United’s season is stability, sacking the manager will make the team unstable, there is also no suitable replacement manager I can think of who is currently available.

Watched the football this afternoon as well, the Arsenal-Newcastle clash was interesting enough, it finished 2-0 to Arsenal, good result which will keep Chelsea and Manchester United on their toes. I also watched Chelsea take on newly promoted Wigan. Wigan were by far the better team which I think surprised everybody. They had many chances to win the game but failed to convert any of them. The game ended very disappointingly, (unless you’re a Chelsea fan) Chelsea scored in literally the dying seconds to earn a fully undeserved win.

Posted by sean on August 6, 2005 at 1:14 pm in Trains with No Comments

Right I am now on the train, the seating is not ideal and there are a lot of screaming kids about. One minute they are laughing the next they are crying, they are like Craig from Big Brother. Not to worry though, I am finally on the train and at least I am sitting down.

The train is going VERY slowly now, it is like some old woman is driving, I know the plan is to extend the retirement age but this should not apply to train drivers OLD PEOPLE SHOULD NOT DRIVE TRAINS.

I am rather hungry now and am tempted to go to the buffet, I am wondering how much I will pay for a sandwich, I would expect it to be close to a fiver for two pieces of brad and a bit of filling. Rip off!

Posted by sean on August 6, 2005 at 12:17 pm in Trains with No Comments

I am currently sitting in a café in Bristol Temple Meads Station. Things have not exactly gone to plan.

Firstly my friend was late so we missed the train from Bath, not really a problem as the train from Bristol to Birmingham was running late. Trouble is it was packed and they were only allowing on Reserved Seat Customers. I ordered my tickets online through who said they would try to reserve me tickets, obviously they didn’t try hard enough.

My friend being late also meant I had to get a taxi to the station, I was driven by an Aussie who was lobbing the cricket, I don’t know much about it but it seems England are getting thrashed by Australia.

At the station I then got harassed by a dirty man. He kept asking me if I knew anything about the lost property department – I’M NOT FUCKIN’ STAFF!!! Duno what he had lost, certainly not a bar of soap as he looked like he had never used one.

Anyway, I’m off to find another train. Haven’t had time for a grammar or spell check so its probably all bollocks.

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